As happens so often, the bitterness and hurt mentioned before were due to rumors being spread that were not true. The scared part was because I had written a letter to my mom and I wasn't sure how she would react to something that was written in it. I have talked to her since she read the letter and she didn't even mention it. At first I was thinking, "Ya, whatever. I should have known you didn't care." But then I started thinking that she's probably going to write me back and discuss it in the letter. It's frustrating thinking negative things before positive things. Doggone self-worth issues!!! I'm glad to see things are changing though and that I'm starting to be able to see how things could turn out positively before it actually happens, which it usually does.